Dog brings live grenade back to master:

A collie dog who had chased a stick thrown by her owner, came back with a live grenade in her mouth. Shadow found the explosive device on a riverbank beside the River Wye in Hampton Bishop, Hereford. Owner Gordon Husband eased the device from her mouth before carrying it gently 1½ miles to his home.

There's little doubt what Shadow had in mind for her "master."

She was probably wondering how she'd take care of the rest of the family. Imagine how pleased she must have been when Gordy obligingly carried it back to his home.

Dogwash opens in Chile:

A pet shop in Chile is offering a dog cleaning service that resembles a car wash. It has a giant tunnel which the dog passes through to emerge clean and flea-free. Inside the tunnel staff carry out different parts of the cleaning process. Nothing is seen from the outside, so customers think it works like an automatic carwash. Javier Fresard, Dogwash's owner, said, "The tunnel was built so we could have a modern touch in the shop. Soon we will play classical music inside it so that the dogs can feel relaxed."

Why do dog stories usually end up demonstrating how foolish people are? The dog owners think this scam works like an automatic car wash? The shop owner wants to play classical music so the dogs can feel relaxed? Try the 1812 Overture and report back to us next week.

Schoolboy brings history teacher a live grenade:

A 16-year-old Rumanian boy took a live grenade to school to try and impress his history teacher. The boy, from Miroslava in Iasi county, said he found the Second World War grenade in the field near his grandparents' house. He thought it would be a good addition to the school's museum.

"Well, it seemed like a smart thing to do. My dog brings us explosive devices all the time."

Diane Arbus explains.

Which internet service do dogs prefer?

They say people begin to resemble their dogs after awhile.

Missing dog returns home after two years:

Sally-Ann, a Jack Russell terrier, has returned home after vanishing almost two years ago. Clare Topcu said she never gave up hope of being reunited with her beloved friend. She was convinced Sally-Ann was not dead because she was microchipped, and her body would have been traced. After being reunited, Mrs. Topcu said: "Sally-Ann recognised me straight away. I always knew in my heart she was alive. My family is complete again."

At first, I wasn't sure if the dog or the owner was the one who had been microchipped, but on second reading, it's obvious that Sally-Ann wears the microchip. Clare is the one wearing the aluminum foil helmet on her head.

Dog floods house after turning on tap:

A stray dog which was locked in an empty house in New Zealand has flooded the top story after turning on a tap. The yellow labrador-cross managed to turn on the tap to get a drink, but it caused serious water damage to the ceiling, walls and carpet of the story below. A dog control officer said it appeared a box of tissues the dog was chewing on fell into the sink and blocked the drain. Neighbours discovered the dog sitting at a window after they chopped down a tree in their garden which allowed a better view of the house in Taupo.

This reminds me of Truman Capote's In Cold Blood. Here we have a case of "The dog, with a box of tissues, in the attic!"

Watch for the movie version of this story. The stray dog is played by Jack Nicholson.

By the way, what's up with those neighbors, chopping down a tree so they could get a better view of the house?

You know people have gone too far when they start swapping spit with their pooches.
There's a lot of things I could say about these two pictures, but do I really need to?

Hunter shot by own dog:

A US hunter has been badly injured after being shot by his own dog. Michael Murray was lining up a photograph of the pheasants his party had shot when it happened. Sonny, his year-old English setter pup, jumped on a 12-bore shotgun lying on the ground and it went off. Murray said, "At first I didn't know what happened. I got that blinding flash of pain and I sat down. Blood was pumping out of my ankle." He admits he is slightly embarrassed by the incident: "That's the hard part, talking to people, because you feel like such a fool."

You're a fool if you still have that dog!

Dog racks up $95,000 car:

Television presenter Johnny Vaughan says his pet dog crashed his sports car in a bizarre accident. Vaughan's bulldog nudged his $95,000 Maserati into gear and stepped on the accelerator -- sending it flying into a van. Vaughan said the crash happened after he stopped to check on his dog Harvey as he drove him home after a visiting a veterinarian. With the engine still running, Vaughan got out of the car and walked round to the passenger's side, where the dog was sitting. It was then Harvey leapt on the controls, causing $18,000 of damage

There are many lessons to be learned from this tragic story.

First, when your dog is sitting in the passenger seat, be sure he's wearing a seatbelt.

Next, if you allow your dog to drive, be sure you teach him how to handle a stick shift.

Finally, your dog knows what the veterinarian cut off, and who put up the money for it. Watch your back.

SWAT team surround dog for five hours:

A Police SWAT team has spent five hours surrounding a house in Seattle only to find they had been laying siege to a dog. Police officers had repeatedly tried to enter into negotiations with the armed man they thought was holed up in the house. They had also thrown tear gas canisters through the windows and engaged in sophisticated manoeuvres to try to lure the suspect outside. Police were called to the house by a man who said he had heard shots.

Well, he probably did. We already know that dogs like to shoot guns at people.

A crime of passion, no doubt.

What is it about dogs and smooching, anyway?

Police dog bites football players; game is abandoned:

A police dog has forced a football match to be abandoned after running on to the pitch and biting three players. It snatched a linesman's flag before running on to the pitch and biting three Lincoln Moorlands reserve players just minutes into the match.

And afterwards? Time to relax with a cold brewski!